Bacon Rorschach - how OCD effects everything
Today was an amazingly full and active day of serendipity and synchronicity. After an early waking and a gratifying morning of sunlight on the patio, coffee, bacon and eggs, I left for the mindfulness symposium, and Jen worked on the yards with Tommy. The symposium was insightful. It's hard to explain how it affected me, but it did feel like I was in a room filled with like-minded people seeking connection and community while trying to manifest constant awareness of interconnection. I told Jen I wasn't sure if I drank some tainted Kool-Aid or if I found a calling. I also noted recently how I was vacillating between associating the past year's exposure and growth with something "coming my way" or my actively seeking it and, in doing so, pursuing and receiving it. Whatever the case, I supposed August might be the point historians reflect on my journals as the point he 'lost it.' I'm inclined to think I've found it, though. It being comfortable being genuine, authentic, accessible and inquisitive. While I was there for the full day, Jen and Tommy completed the lawn work. Amazing. We went to dinner together at an Indian place in Saratoga, and then Jen went to Frank and Ilana's with me to meet with the symposium attendees for a casual open house. That was a continuation of the earlier experiences and gave me a chance to talk to them about involvement in some of their upcoming plans and efforts. It's a chance to enter a field of influence I've wanted to be a part of for some time. Finally, today, about 12+ years after I reached out to attempt to apologize to a friend I'd callously abandoned back in 1998, the response at the time being a slammed door of anger, I received a new message reaching back out to reframe and revisit that slam. I'm not sure how to process it right now, but it's seemingly all in alignment with the theme of the chaos of nature and the lack of control over anything beyond your reactions.