Throwing The Baby Out With The Holy Water?

I'm in an interesting position. My wife and I talked last night about her desire to provide the kids with some sort of spiritual exposure. Given my rather open and firm stance against organized religion on the whole, she's had to compromise a great deal of her own needs and desires for a spiritual routine, and along with that, she's concerned that the kids have limited exposure to moral teaching, golden rules, or anything of a spiritual nature when the only source is within our home. We don't have any routine practice or make any conscious effort to consistently do so.
In addition, the topic of private schools came up, one option being Catholic schools, of which she herself is an alumni. From what she, and a couple of my close friends have told me, there's really little/no religious dogma pushed or forced on the students, and the benefits, for them at least, greatly outweigh any drawbacks. I know at least two 'non believers' that are paying to send their kids to Catholic schools and they're fine with it. I'm on the fence, as doing so at this age seems a bit premature.
In addition, there's a requirement of Baptism, which really bothers me, as it's, IMHO, a completely idiotic requirement and ritual. I am dumbstruck to imagine that anybody really believes that the act of immersion in water under the right circumstances somehow means anything at all in this world or the next. It's inane, which in this case, is "insane" with a silent 's'. I mean, come on, now... really. The act has no more meaning or bearing then having been the last one tagged "it" during the last hide 'n seek game I ever played. I've not since walked through life forever "it", just as many, many people raised in religious situations have not spent their life being Christians or Catholic's simply because of a baptism. I know it means nothing, but in the grand scheme of things, I find it incredibly frustrating, then, to support and participate in a pointless act of compliance.
I'm reminded of one of my favorite analogies: a story of a woman who, when cooking a ham, always cut the ends of the ham off. When asked by her husband as to why she did this, she said "I don't know... my mother always did so I have too.". Curious as to why, the husband calls his mother-in-law to ask about it, and she says the same thing as her daughter did. "It's how I learned to cook a ham from my mother.". The son contacts his wife's grandmother, and when asked about the practice, she simply says "my baking pan was too small."
Now, I had my upbringing, with minimal involvement in religion, and my wife's was similar, but with a bit more early adolescent experience, primarily through having attended a catholic high school and making catholic friends. But she's not attached to any religion or belief system either. If I had to summarize it from my point of view, she's spiritual, but not religious. She believes there's something more and something greater then just our physical presence and being, but she's not convinced that any belief system properly or completely represents it. She's far from an atheist. Perhaps she is a very very moderate agnostic but only in the sense of any one religion having the absolute answer as to what might be going on.
We've tried, a couple of times, to look into Unitarian churches over the years, but those either integrate fundamental religious beliefs within the context of "any and all faiths are represented', or they are way to "out there", wherein the smell of pachouli incense fill the room while drum circles and gregorian chants take the place of organ music, choirs and the congregation reciting "Lord be with you" in rote fashion.
It seems that there's really nothing, at this point, in our society, that provides a routine opportunity for a sense of community , teachings of core human values, and exposure to the concepts of spirituality without being tied to a religion. I can't consider going along with something I absolutely do not believe in simply to gain the benefits that might come with it, or to discount the negative aspects as well. If I was able to make that compromise, I'd already be a Mormon.
Our kids are closing in on 5 years old. My wife's desire is to introduce them to spiritual ideas and the general teaching of moral practices. She's not talking about bible classes or any religious teachings or discussions at home or outside of a weekly visit to a church. I can't say I object to that idea completely, because it's an eventuality that they'll be exposed to religion in many other ways, but I struggle with the fact that they're as young as they are, they're still impressionable, subject to taking fantasy as reality, considering an adult an authority figure without question, and subject to fears that may be incorporated into a sermon.
I recognize that there's two parents involved, that my wife's gone without a sense of spirituality for many years, and the options are highly limited. I'm willing to let her give it a shot and see how it goes. But I'm not completely sure how I feel about it right now.

Hours Go By Like Days

It was a long weekend. The kids, were.... uh.... they were.... umm... challenging. I have to write part of it off to my son's allergies, a great deal of activities on Saturday, and to staying up well beyond their very routine and established bedtime, but they really were pressing every button imaginable. We've been practicing some techniques we've learned to get more control over some of the things they do. Perhaps it's working just enough that they're trying extra hard to illicit a reaction for their negative behavior that there were receiving up until recently.



Whatever the case, it was a long weekend, and even this morning, dropping them at preschool, it was all I could do to not react in any way to them when they were not being well behaved. I had to get out of the car and step back for a few minutes to just collect myself, and of course, to swig a couple of shots from my iFlask.



On one fun note, I had the opportunity on Sunday morning to pass along another wonderful milestone of childhood to them. When I was a kid, we'd put a playing cards onto the bike using a clothespin so they'd stick into the spokes and produce a "motor" like sound. Well, clothespin are not things we have around the house, and I didn't want to ruin a perfectly good deck of cards, so some tape and business cards works just as well, and they're thrilled with the results.

Hours Go By Like Days

It was a long weekend. The kids, were.... uh.... they were.... umm... challenging. I have to write part of it off to my son's allergies, a great deal of activities on Saturday, and to staying up well beyond their very routine and established bedtime, but they really were pressing every button imaginable. We've been practicing some techniques we've learned to get more control over some of the things they do. Perhaps it's working just enough that they're trying extra hard to illicit a reaction for their negative behavior that there were receiving up until recently.

Whatever the case, it was a long weekend, and even this morning, dropping them at preschool, it was all I could do to not react in any way to them when they were not being well behaved. I had to get out of the car and step back for a few minutes to just collect myself, and of course, to swig a couple of shots from my iFlask.

On one fun note, I had the opportunity on Sunday morning to pass along another wonderful milestone of childhood to them. When I was a kid, we'd put a playing cards onto the bike using a clothespin so they'd stick into the spokes and produce a "motor" like sound. Well, clothespin are not things we have around the house, and I didn't want to ruin a perfectly good deck of cards, so some tape and business cards works just as well, and they're thrilled with the results.

I Never Imagined I'd Say This, But..

Thanks, Yoko.

Given that the central message in that song, let along much of the body of his work, was far from dogmatic or religious, it's amazing that the producers of this film had the nerve to do this. Then again, from what I've read about the movie, that's only the tip of the iceberg.

Yoko Ono Sues Over Use of Song 'Imagine' in Movie Challenging Darwinian Evolution]

The Avian Bird Flu Out The Window

Along the lines of my prior post about capitalizing on "Green" awareness, while home last night, listening to the news encompass everything from the political race to the FLDS compound in Texas, my mind wandered through some of the big "scares" of the last few years, and it came to a screeching halt on the Avian Bird Flu. Whatever happened to that, anyway? There was loads of press and visibility around this issue a couple of years ago, and most of the articles were very bleak and gloomy. And although the issue remains one of great concern within the medical community, and there's plenty of monitoring and tracking of the situation ongoing, there's no media coverage. Nobody's talking about it any more in public forums.

I have to admit that it's things like this that make it easier to understand how some of my extended family scoffs at the global warming concerns. With so many cries of "wolf", how does one know the difference between a false alarm and a real threat?

Selling The Green Sieze

It's happened. It was inevitable. It's the way it always goes. I saw it coming. In fact, I remember watching it, consciously, post 9/11, and being as disturbed then as I am now. Yet it keeps happening. I guess they can't help it. It's what marketing is about. It's what they do. So when terrorists attack, or floods wipe out a portion of a cities residence, or the climate change becomes more of a prevalent concern in our lives.... there'll be a clear change in the ads you see, as products and companies try and cash in, jump on the band wagon, and position themselves at the center of what's foremost on peoples minds. Shortly after 9/11, it was all about our country, our families, our safety, and their two-ply toilet tissue or the true value of their hardware stores. Today, as you must see, more and more ads are centered around being "Green". Everybody has some angle their spinning about how they're the green spot, the green stop, the green solution and the source for all things that'll save the earth.



It makes me wince, because it's predominantly insincere. There are books and websites all over now, dedicated to "green marketing". And you know, you just know, the decision to adopt the ad campaign isn't at all about changing the world, reducing carbon footprints, addressing the need for global awareness about the actions we need to take in order to turn things around. It's about seizing the moment, and those green-dollars being spent by people actually concerned and taking action. I can just see the board room of executives examining a pie-chart showing the growing $'s being spent on green products, and discussing how best to get that money spent with them instead of somebody else.



Call me bitter. Cynical. Cranky-pants. But I'd not be saying this if I'd not seen it happen so many times before.

The Horror... The Horror...

I read an interesting article last month detailing a move on China's part to ban "Horror" films in their country. The broad description of "Horror" is stated as "wronged spirits and violent ghosts, monsters, demons, and other inhuman portrayals, strange and supernatural storytelling for the sole purpose of seeking terror and horror.". Apparently it has to do with trying to "control and cleanse the negative effect these items have on society, and to prevent horror, violent, cruel publications from entering the market through official channels and to protect adolescents' psychological health.". The discussions and comments on the few sites I've looked at are generally incensed and offended at the censorship. I, on the other hand, wish we'd have something similar here.

I've mentioned my feelings about the horror genre in the past and feel like spending a bit more time here discussing the conflicts I have with it. I'll go on record as having been a big fan of movies like "Halloween","Alien", and even though I walked out on it when i first saw it, "An American Werewolf in London".

Examining the reason I walked out of "An American Werewolf in London" might be a good place to start. If you've seen the film, it's relatively tame by today's standards, but at the time of its release, it was as cutting edge as they got. And the "cutting edge" that caused me to leave the theatre and await my friend outside was the slicing of the main character's throat in what ended up being a dream sequence, within a dream sequence.

It freaked me out, big time. And I was appalled at the violent depiction of the act of cutting a throat. Nowadays, we see far more disturbing images in prime-time TV commercials. In fact, recently, while exercising at the gym and glancing over at the TV screen of a nearby treadmill, I caught a segment of one of the many "CSI" shows. In this scene, they showed, in horrifically graphic detail, the corpse of what was once a beautiful young girl. Her face was sunken, pale, and botched, with significant bruising and scarring all about. It was an horrific image of a brutal crime against a human being. And the most disturbing thing is the knowledge that these images are shown every week on numerous shows in numerous fashions.

There was a time, not too long ago, that our society has much less tolerance for so graphic a depiction. In fact, just going back to the 60s, and the release of Alfred Hitchcock's "Psycho", you find a culture that was in strong opposition to the murder taking place in the shower. It was considered completely over the top, and something that simply went too far. Yet in the last 50 years, the line of good taste has all but been erased. And with the advent of "Reality TV", I'm hard pressed to imagine that executions and actual deaths might end up being broadcast for the entertainment of the masses. And of course, to sell cars and beer.

Remember the movie "The Rock"? I do. Vividly. I saw it with some friends one evening, and I was taken on a wild, exhilarating roller-coaster ride of suspense and action. I'd just begun dating somebody at the time who had strongly held religious convictions, and took her to see it a week or two later. After doing so, we had a rather heated discussion/debate in the parking lot about the violence in the movie. She found it greatly disturbing. I didn't think it was any big deal whatsoever. And so the conversation went, with her arguing that the degree of violence portrayed only served to desensitize the audience and our society to violence on the whole. I could not have disagreed more. It was 'just a movie' and nobody "really took the violence at face value". We went back and forth about it for some time, agreed to disagree, and went our separate ways. And only then, with the pressure to defend my position out of the way, did I really start to think through the arguments, the movie, and the concerns about the impact of so many movies and so many deceptions. And damned if she wasn't right. It was not about that one specific film, but about an entire trend, genre, and general "pushing of the envelope" that had been taking place over many years.

The line ahead is the line we crossed so many years ago. We're staring to lap it. It's not healthy, it's not necessary, and it's certainly not "entertainment".