This early gift was enrollment in a “28-day challenge” ketogenic program with Jen, from Jen. She signed us up to participate together, and the biggest gift was that she signed her self up to do all of the necessary prep and cooking for us both, for the full 28 days! All I needed to do was eat what I was given. That’s it. It’s one of the best gifts I’ve ever received. It’s an experience, much-needed help, and a service gesture that would have otherwise been a barrier to my success. The perfect gift.
The result of this effort is that after one month time I'm down 13 pounds, 20 away from my target weight. My frustration is gone, my struggling is gone, my heartburn is gone, and with all of this, my mindset and attitude have significantly improved. I owe this all to the wonderful gift of support and assistance from this wonderful woman.
This whole effort gave me the necessary momentum to head into the new year with a reinvigorated intention to reclaim control of my time and focus, simplifying and minimizing the distractions, struggles, and conflicts that so easily overtake my day and negatively impact my attitude. I wrote about those intentions previously in my “Read, Write, Recover” entry, and I made my phone’s lock-screen the image I’d attached to that post. "Wake up with determination, go to bed with satisfaction."
I am proud to say that I've managed to make great progress in only 10 days. I am following that prior post’s plan and focusing on six high-level areas of my life, on a daily basis. I’m staying focused and being visibly engaged and contributing during my work days, sticking to my dietary regime for the benefits of my overall physical and mental health, meditating on a daily basis and keeping mindful of my intentions and impacts, reading inspirational books that feed my effort in this, and writing several times a week.
I don’t think I have watched and TV this whole time, and although I am not abandoning my interest in doing so occasionally, it speaks to the fact that what I’m gaining so far has been more enriching and impactful. What I have been doing is reducing all of the distractions and ‘noise’ that has previously been overwhelming to a point of ‘deafening’ my own thoughts, needs, and aspirations. With those turned down or off, I can amplify my focus on just those things that bring me the most joy
The 7-day meditation I began this morning via the “Calm” app, focused on gratitude. And I want to write about gratitude here. I seldom focus on how lucky I am. I get frustrated with traffic or conflicting work demands, or something as minor as being interrupted in mid-sentence, even though I am guilty of doing that myself. This meditation effort has helped me reinforce the breadth of things I want to stay consciously aware of, serving as the foundation of my actions and reactions, each day.
I am nowhere near perfect. I don't believe perfection is realistic. I still find myself getting irritated by backtalk from my son, having made the wrong turn, forgetting something when I'm rushing out the door, etc.. But I AM doing better. I am absolutely doing better. I’m catching myself far quicker and far earlier when irritations arise, stopping sooner, and backing away calmly, stepping away from the tensions with my hands in the air while letting the drama fall to the ground. I am keeping (returning) things in perspective. These efforts are becoming conscious and will evolve to be instinctual. This is proving to be transformational.
There is always an opportunity to engage with a clerk, a driver or any passerby, with either regard or disregard. It's a gift to myself when I make an effort of regard and recognition. To wave, smile, or chat with somebody as if, even though we are complete strangers, we are somehow connected. Because we are. And I am always positively influenced by the slightest smile, gesture or act of consideration as well.
Three years ago I was lying in a hospital bed, incapable of walking. I recovered, I'm fortunate enough to have been treated quickly and successfully, but I have forgotten about that whole experience. I still wish that the neurological damage resulting in a phantom “sand between my toes” feeling stuck around. I think it would have served as a daily reminder. But in the absence of that, the aforementioned phone 'wallpaper' and my renewed focus are working quite well. The efforts I’m making now are resurrecting feelings I left the hospital with, and the mediation has reminded me of the good graces and options available to me: where I live, the job I have, the people I work with, the love and good nature of my children, the love and good nature of Jen, these are all things to be grateful for.
When I think about the those living under different circumstances, or of the awful loses related to fire and flood causing everything you have to be completely destroyed, I just don't see how I have any room at all to complain about shit as insignificant as a bit of traffic, job-related stressors, or being cut-off while talking by somebody excited and wanting to share, as I have done too.
The other night, my daughter and I were discussed my wish to be more of a positive force in the world. As we talked the idea came up that, once a month, we would just go do something to help others in need. This month we will likely run to a thrift store, buy blankets and donate them shelters. We will start getting more involved in service and community projects. Once a month is easy. And we will both look back with far more satisfaction at the outcome of the time spent.
Postscript: After writing my first draft of this, I came across a short film that pretty much encapsulates just what I’ve been working towards. I like it so much that I may make it my ‘alarm tone’. I can wake up to this reminder of how I want to approach each day, each situation, each individual, and each opportunity to give and then gain in return.