Yeah, the whole "dog getting up early" thing is getting old quickly. 6 am at my own pace is OK, but on whimpering demand? Not a fan. Still, dog or not, the early morning light remains my favorite way to awaken. The "SAD" light's an ok alternative, but it's nowhere near the same—just the next best thing. I have a few craigslist searches saved for various items, including packing and moving boxes, because I know that between college and moving, we'll need them. Somebody posted a slew of free boxes and wrapping paper, and I jumped on it. Not realizing just how much there was. I did not know if I would get it all in the CRV, but I just managed to do so. I went to Pano, attended some meetings, then returned to Matson for no other reason than simply not wanting to be at Panorama in case Tommy came by. How fucked up is that? Yes, being around him is that bad, and that's the basis for what comes next. I'm going to kick him out after he graduates. Assuming he even does. It's honestly heartbreaking to have reached this point. I had such a love for him, wanted the best, and put so much time into doing all I could, but I never drew firm lines and was never allowed to be a parent. Now, it's time to draw a rugged and solid line. The damage he has done repeatedly has made my sanity and survival reliant on getting him out of our lives. My counselor has been making it clear that I have a right to protect myself from use and abuse, and that's what this all comes down to. This will be as 'significant' as was my telling Linda I could not continue living in a dissatisfying marriage. I worked more when I returned, and Jen and I went back to Panorama to meet the windows salesman. I'm not fond of sales. I hate the game, the dance, the sales pitch, the rote taglines and routines and the performance ending in "sign today and get 10% off" pressure. They want $23k to replace seven windows. Fuck that. We have far more critical things to do with the limited resources. We will find another option. The rest of my day was spent working on the board presentation for tomorrow, which I hope will be entertaining, along with a quick run to Savers with Lauren to get a few things.
📊 seven-day averages: ⚖️ 161.4 lbs,❤️ 61.3 bpm, 👣 5024.1 steps, 🧘🏼5 min