Linda called me 21 times overnight. That's half her all time record.
Austin texted me as well, passing along that Linda was trying to reach me and saying I should call her. I've had these texts from others: Golida, Bonnie, Kelly, Andrea, and more. She calls Lauren when I don't answer her and insists she get me on the phone.
It’s infuriating at times. It’s not sustainable. But adding understanding and compassion into this makes it at least understandable. That’s a challenge at times. The support group says that being a caregiver is a marathon, not a race. And that you don’t know it’s distance until you reach a finish line you can’t help but dread.
When I wake each day I do all I can to avoid all distractions and demands, and just focus on a set of calming introspective mediations. If I don't get to them before my mind starts processing whatever needs of my time are presented, It's harder to stay present.
I use the "Calm" app, which has two daily meditations I listen to back to back. They're randomized, not selected by me, but just what's published for that day.
I pressed the call log and Austin's texts out of my mind for the moment, sat to focus and mediate, opened the app, and these were what greeted me. "Empathy" & "The Care Principle".
The first spoke of the difference between sympathy and empathy, and how being with somebody in a grieving state or going through something traumatic can be more valuable to them when you put yourselves in their shoes, and simply support and echo their feelings, not denying truth of the situation or their pain.
The second was about how treating something or somebody with care is a gift to yourself and others. That when you interact with something delicately and with recognition of its value and fragility, you gain the benefit of being in an enlightened moment of compassion, connection and sharing. That when you incorporate care into everything, from the annoying colleague wanting to chat your ear off, to the manner in which you gently press an elevator button instead of repeatedly jabbing it and potentially damaging it, you gain. They gain. And the next people that encounter that person, or use that elevator, gain too.