Living In Fear

I awoke at 4.30am to what sounded like a soft set of 3 knocks. I dismissed it as imagination. Then a few moments later I heard it again, and assume it was my son at the bedroom door. I got up and opened it and he was not there. But the patio and driveway lights, motion triggered, were both on.

I saw nobody through the french doors. I went to the front door, quietly, and peered out and saw nobody there either. The gate leading from the patio to the walkway was closed but unlocked as it frequently is.

I opened the door, with trepidation, anticipating somebody lurking and waiting to pounce and force their way in. Nothing.

I don’t know what that was all about. As my son had commented earlier when he thought he saw somebody going up our driveway in the evening when we were sitting on the patio, our neighborhood is ‘sketchy’.

It’s upsetting to me that anybody would have to live in fear of others. That there are people willing to smash a car window to take your belongings or assault you over an argument, as just a couple of examples, is so wrong on so many levels. And the reality of that makes me feel we’re so far gone as a species and  society that there’s little hope it’ll ever be possible to achieve true global world peace and unity. When we can’t even find it in our own communities.

I also live in fear that my former brother-in-law, a man with a history of physical violence, somebody I don’t think will ever understand or accept the true nature and history of my current relationship with his ex-wife, will show up one day and beat me to a pulp. Or worse. For no valid reason, with no purpose other than to express his displaced and ill informed anger. 

So on top of everything else I have that added fear when i face what sounds like an intruder in the early morning hours.

It could be much worse. So much worse. Look around the world at the fear others live in, within our own country and then outward to other nations and their social and political climates.

Richard Dawkins aptly pointed out that national pride has evil consequences. I agree. It fosters an “us vs them” mentality.. When, if ever, might we recognize our shared humanity as the core of what connects us? Not gender, color, birth-place or unwieldiness to, within reason, allow for errors in time and judgement, or in perception vs reality of actions or beliefs?

Instead of a segment of a single continent simply chanting “U.S.A.”, we should, as the unified populace of the planet, all be chanting “D.N.A.”, and acting on that awareness, too.

Strangers passing in the street
By chance two separate glances meet
And I am you and what I see is me- Roger Waters