Training Day

I spent the most of the morning and afternoon with my son today, on a training mission. He got a new train set at Christmas and wanted to go check out some train related shops and exhibits. BUT he's also in rare form as far as his degree of entitlement goes. He's in a shitty mood. Mean, angry, bitter, demanding. I'm being told it's because of the divorce.

He and I went through that awhile back. I've been called some horrible things by him and on occasion i've been speechless and i've not been able to bite my tongue in response. I had to ride out a few tantrums and verbal volleys today and I did my best to try and do so without being pulled 'into the ring'. That's something he seems to want to do a great deal... argue and snap at and make put down and just keep the negative exchange going. I think it's power struggle. I think he's really mad at me and feels both abandoned, and thrust into being 'the man' at home when it comes to feeling like things are safe and he and the others are protected. It's a shitty place for him to be in and I really regret it.

BUT 3 years ago the same issues existed and 3 years ago my ability to ride it out was nonexistent. At least now I have a chance to approach him and these situations as my own person with my own perspectives, and with far less raw nerves.

So... I rode it out, several times, and let him blow off some steam, waiting long enough for an eventually apology, and then we'd get back on track.

We spent a good deal of time on track today. Far more then we spent derailed.